Owning & Changing Your Deeply Rooted Beliefs
Episode 358: Show Notes
Welcome back to another episode of the Strategy Hour Podcast! Today, we dive into the topic of owning and changing your deeply rooted beliefs. Imagine you are a tree and you have an abundance of beautiful fruit hanging from you, but you also have fruit that is rotten, that you feel ashamed of and that you don’t want others to see. The only way to determine what the problem is, why there is this bad fruit, is to go through the entire system to see where the change needs to happen.
On this episode, we talk about behavior, values, and beliefs using the metaphor of a tree – a helpful way to better understand ourselves and others. How do you bring about change in your life, where do you begin? We talk about where our values come from and how we can begin to not only change ourselves but our entire communities. Regardless of how ingrained you think your behavior is, we all have the ability to grow and improve and to even do a complete 180! This episode brings you inspirational stories and lots of practical advice for business, raising kids, and life in general, so be sure to tune in!
Where Values and Beliefs Come From
Using the analogy of a tree, your branches represent your values, and these are the parts that produce the fruit. Your values determine how you see the world and what you prioritize and it ultimately determines what your actions will be. This applies to every aspect of life and also to our businesses, and we often express these values by having a mission statement or by delineating clearly what we prioritize – and this is reflected in our schedules, for example. What the world often doesn’t see is where those values actually come from – our roots. So the fruit comes from actions that result from the values we have, and these values are being fed by our deeply rooted beliefs. These beliefs are parented, meaning that we are socialized into them, by our parents, by society and its norms. Our deeply held beliefs are usually our knee-jerk reactions to things, those first reactions and responses that bubble up before we have even really thought them through. They are so ingrained, they roll off your tongue and it takes training to change them.
Changing Your Beliefs Before You Can Change Your Actions
It is very difficult, if not impossible, to change your actions (fruit) without addressing the deeply held beliefs (roots) where they come from in the first place. Take for example a man who abuses his wife and children. He might condemn his own behavior just as much as anyone, but he does not know how to act differently, because the actions come from having problematic beliefs. Perhaps his own parents did not abuse him, but somehow he learned that he needed to be a strong authoritative figure and parent in a strictly disciplinarian way. But if this man was to go and redefine what he truly believes, to decide that he would value kindness and generosity more highly, then his behavior toward his family will start to look different. It takes time and unlearning to replace those values with other ones, but it is totally possible. In business, how we treat money and the financial decisions we make are also rooted in our beliefs. This could involve exchanging the belief that selling and making money is selfish to viewing it as an act of service, an act of love.
Transforming A Whole Community
How do you affect an entire community with the changes that you have implemented in your life and business? People will start to notice a difference and ask you about it, and it comes down to teaching others to change their beliefs and values for them to change their actions. When you start producing good fruit, people will see this and want some of what you have. These kinds of positive changes are contagious and inspire others to do the same. Even if you are predominantly online and you are not physically around community members, you can still impact them in so many different ways. Abagail’s health journey has been such a good example of this and how it has impacted many other people who have wanted to achieve similar goals.
A Lesson from The Buddha of Oakland
There was a story on the Criminal podcast about the Buddha of Oakland, about this guy and his wife who live in a crime-ridden neighborhood in California who made a really positive impact on their community. Right across from their house there was an area that was being used as a dumping ground for trash, so the two decided to put something on the piece of lawn to deter people from putting their rubbish there. They went to the store and got a concrete Buddha and planted it into the ground so it couldn’t be stolen. After a while, another person came around and delicately painted it, and as the months went by, people just added more and it became a legitimate shrine. It resulted in a decrease in littering, crime, and graffiti, significantly uplifting the community.
How All of This Relates to Business
Our beliefs and values around money are good examples of how this relates to business. The way we think about money is shaped through our childhood experiences and what we come to learn from our parents and other influential people. In some cases, these beliefs can go back many generations and in this way perpetuate through families. Sometimes the things we learn are not even true, yet they still impact us. If you believe that you never have enough and that you lack, you will behave in ways that reflect that, for example by refusing to invest in something that could potentially help your business. This is so important for people with kids and being intentional about what you teach them. There are many awesome resources to guide you and your loved ones along the journey of a changed mind.
Quote This
We cannot change our values unless we first change our beliefs.
Highlights
Where Values and Beliefs Come from. [0:06:03]
Changing Your Beliefs Before You Can Change Your Actions. [0:09:03]
Transforming A Whole Community [0:13:12]
A Lesson from The Buddha of Oakland [0:17:43]
How All of This Relates to Business. [0:21:34]
ON TODAY’S SHOW
Abagail & Emylee
The Strategy Hour Podcast
We help overwhelmed and creative entrepreneurs break down their Oprah-sized dreams to create a functioning command center to tame the chaos of their business. Basically, we think you’re totally bomb diggity, we’re about to uplevel the shiz out of your business.
KEY TOPICS
Values, Beliefs, Personal growth, Change, Community
WE MENTIONED
The Buddha of Oakland story